A Valentine's Day Poem for Fishermen

Collards is green,

My dog's name is Blue,

And I'm so lucky,

To have a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like cornsilk,

A-flappin' in the breeze,

Softer than Blue's,

And without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,

Which excite me in May,

You ain't got no scales,

But I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as okry

Jist a-fry'n in the pan,

Yo're as fragrant as "snuff,"

Right outta the can.

You have som'a yore teeth,

For which I am proud,

I hold my head high,

When we're in a crowd.

On special occasions,

When you shave under yore arms,

Well, I'm in hawg heaven,

And awed by yore charms.

Still, them fellers at work,

They all want to know,

What I did to deserve,

Such a purdy, young doe.

Like a good roll of duct tape,

Yo're there for yore man,

To patch up life's troubles,

And fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug,

A-buzzin' overhead,

You ain't mean like those far ants,

I found in my bed.

Cut from the best cloth,

Like a plaid flannel shirt,

You spark up my life,

More than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight,

Like a padded gunrack,

My life is complete,

Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection,

Like the best vinyl sidin',

Despite all the years,

Yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie,

With an RC cold drank,

We go together,

Like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate,

For Valentine's Day,

They git it at Wal-Mart,

It's romantic that way.

Some men git roses,

On that special day,

From the cooler at Kroger,

"That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds,

From a flea market booth,

"Diamonds are forever,"

They explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,

These won't do,

Cause yo're too special,

You sweet thang you.

I got you a gift,

Without taste nor odor,

More useful than diamonds...

It's a new trollin' motor!!!