Heard the Old Saying: "Looks Aren't Everything"?

There's more truth than fiction in that statement, as I learned all too well while yet a teenager in high school. Back in those days, I was a sucker for every good-lookin' gal I met.

Never will forget one such gal in particular...the one, so to speak, who finally made me open my eyes wide and see those good-lookers...most of 'em, anyway...for what they really were. The date started as most. I went to the door, exchanged pleasantries with her and her folks, then escorted her to my ol' jalopy, and we left. We hadn't gone even a block before I knew I had made a giant mistake.

I had planned this date in advance and even had discussed it with her. She was all in until we were driving away from her house, and then she started "telling me" where we were going and what we were going to do on my dime. She still was spouting her ideas when I had driven around the block, parked the car in front of her house, and told her to get out.

From that point on, I picked my dates carefully.

OK, I admit this was a long way around to just get to the point I want to make, and that is this: All those photos you see of giant bass around the Internet, in magazines, and such very well may be contrived...that's right, they're made up to be "good lookin'," just as a means of sucking you into the story.

Found a little item on the Internet this morning about Scott Hepler, a former head photographer/studio manager at Bass Pro shops, as well as a commercial photographer in Kansas City, MO. This is a guy who says he even "can make a crappie look snappy." What follows are his suggestions "to add more mass to your bass and impress your fishin' buddies."

     * Hold the fish horizontal, with your arms extended. Presenting it to the camera this way makes it look larger than holding it vertically. Try to hide your arms behind the fish, so what you're doing looks less obvious. (Note: The fish in the accompanying photo only weighed about a pound or pound-and-a-half.)

     * Widen and lower the camera angle. Zoom out to the widest lens setting if possible and/or shoot slightly up at the fish. Take a few test shots to determine what looks most realistic.

     * Use the flash. The extra light will fill in shadows on the fish. And because bright objects come forward in photos, while darker ones recede, your catch will magically grow in size. "The effect is enhanced if you're wearing a dark solid shirt," adds Hepler.

     * Grimace a little. This is tough to do while looking natural, but try putting on a strained smile, as if to say, "This sucker is "heavy."

     * Magnify your measurement. Proof? You want proof? Each inch on the Tall Tale Tape (sold for $6 on fishfib.com) is actually only 3/4-inch, so anything photographed next to it looks 33 percent longer. Sneaky? Yes, but effective, too.

Bottom line: So the next time you catch a big 'un, "take charge" of the situation (like my date tried to do that time) and dress that fish up to impress all your buddies.