The Biggest Bass Never Caught

(Found this item while browsing online today and decided to share it with my readers.)

"My wife and I had the opportunity to take a fishing trip down the Wisconsin River. We'd been doing OK--a few here, a few there--your basic river-fishing morning, until 'it' happened.

"We noticed a pinion tree that seemed to have been struck by lightning near its base, leaving it half in the water and its trunk on the sandy shore. I noticed, at the shore, just under the trunk of the tree, the fanning tail of what appeared to be a very large bass. Immediately, I told my wife she should try to catch the fish by first casting her lure onto the shore alongside the tree, then slowly pulling it into the water. 'That bass surely will nab it,' I said, 'but be careful not to spook him.'

"She did as I had instructed--a number of times--with no luck. 'Try a different lure,' I finally said, which she did repeatedly, but still, the bass just stayed put. Now being the expert I am, I said, 'Let me have a go at it.'

"Over and over, I tried to entice the fish, but nothing happened. That fish was driving both of us nuts. We couldn't get it to bite anything when, out of nowhere, a mid-size grey squirrel appeared on the base of the tree trunk. It had noticed a pinion nut on one of the branches of the tree, about two feet above the water.

"With its hind legs grasping the trunk of the tree, the squirrel leaned forward with its front paws to grab the nut. His paws just had touched the nut when the biggest bass I ever had seen in my lifetime jumped completely out of the water and engulfed that unsuspecting squirrel. Comparatively speaking, it looked like a full-grown musky nabbing a may fly.

"My wife and I fell to our seats, looking at each other with our jaws on the floor of the boat, thinking 'what the #$%^ was that?' We never had seen a bass so large and capable of doing such a deed.

"We both agreed it arguably was the most amazing thing we'd ever seen...or so we thought. While sitting there talking about the enormous size and astonishing feat of that fish, the same bass suddenly leaped out of the water again and placed another pinion nut on that branch."