Old Navy Christmas

This is the sixth and final Navy-ized version of the "'Twas the Night Before Christmas" poem. In the foreground of this December 2012 photo is the guided-missile cruiser USS Antietam (CG 54), with its holiday lights displayed while moored at Naval Base San Diego. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Stephen M. Votaw.

Author Unknown

 

'Twas the night before Christmas, compartments were still,

The Sailors were sleeping, as most Sailors will.

The ditty bags hung by the lockers with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

 

The men were all peacefully dreaming in bed,

As visions of liberty danced in each head.

The Chief, in his skivvies, hopped into his rack,

Having just come from town and a quick midnight snack.

 

When out on the deck, there arose such a roar,

I ran to the porthole to find out the score.

I stuck out my head and started to shout,

"Just what in the world is this noise all about?"

 

A moon made for boondocking showed with a glow,

It was downright cold out, 'bout seven below.

What I saw out there looked like those Mardi Gras floats,

'Twas a Captain's gig drawn by four white Navy goats.

 

In the boat was a man who seemed quiet and moody,

I knew in an instant St. Nick had the duty.

As quickly as Monday his billy goats came,

He whistled and shouted and called them by name.

 

"Now Perry, now Farragut, Dewey, and Jones,

What's the matter John Paul, got lead in your bones?

A little to starb'rd, now hold it up short,

No fluffing off now, or you'll go on report!"

 

He was wearing dress "reds" that fit like a charm,

His hash marks, they covered the length of his arm.

The gifts to be issued were all in his pack,

The gedunk was ready to leave on each rack.

 

His eyes, they were watering, his nose caked with ice,

He wiped it with canvas, then sneezed once or twice.

He opened his mouth and started to yawn,

It looked like the sun coming up with the dawn.

 

The stump of a pipe, he held tight in his teeth,

And took a small nip from a bottle beneath.

He wasn't so big, but he must have been strong,

I figured he'd been in SEALs, early and long.

 

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old Tar,

Who said, "Evenin', Matey--here, have a cigar."

He filled every seabag with presents galore,

And left us all with leave papers, right by the door.

 

With "Anchors Aweigh," he climbed back into place,

A broad smile was creeping all over his face.

One look at his watch, and he started to frown,

"This mid-watch is certainly getting me down."

 

Then out to the breakwater and into the night,

The gig started fading, the landscape was bright.

"Merry Christmas!" he said, as he drove on his way,

"Now I'll finish my rounds and sack in for the day."

 

(Courtesy of "The Goat Locker," http://goatlocker.org.)

 

Here's hoping you have enjoyed this series as much as I have enjoyed bringing it to you. Have a wondrously joyous holiday season.